Ease and Transformation: A Manifesto

With a group of kids and their grown-ups from around the world, we walked past the ornately chiseled walls of creamy stone, through the heavy, carved wooden doors, and into the black darkness of the stage wing.

A pool of light came on, highlighting a man standing behind a table filled with convincing replicas of all sorts of objects, weapons, and bygone tools – the props of past productions. He explained his role: he sources and cares for thousands of props, all the seemingly small details that make a production realistic.

Kids pawed over the objects before the puddle of light shifted to a woman standing near a rack of embellished dresses and ensembles. The wardrobe supervisor explained how she manages and cues each costume for quick changes. And then on to the sound manager, the lighting designer, stage manager, and on and on.

We had seen a few productions at the Royal Opera House before, but this was our first glimpse behind the scenes at the team and all the moving parts that come together seamlessly to craft a flawless production. The tour brought a newfound appreciation for the theater.

The glimpse behind the curtain exposed the internal choreography and intention that is typically carefully hidden. A production appeared so easy when viewed from a velvet seat in the plush, gilded auditorium. And I realize that’s one theater team’s marker of success: ease.

Ease means you’re transported into the world created in front of you without missing a beat. Ease means no awkward pauses, no errant people visible, and perfectly timed effects. Any missteps or hangups are quickly ad libbed into the production by talented actors and staff. So much thought, intention, and preparation goes into pulling this off.

The production team collaborates to transport you into moving art that’s made to be experienced. An ephemeral moment in time, the production arises in each moment and fades. And just like any impactful art, great theater transforms you.

“Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable.” — Cesar A. Cruz

As we looked out from center stage toward the empty auditorium, I realized: beyond the theater, each moment is an opportunity to potentially touch each and every person present. To transport them into a different experience – even if only slightly askew from the mundane. To invite shifting something, helping them live a fuller life than they would have without the experience.

But you have to get clear on what you’re creating first.

The intentionality of theater – though certainly not the production quality of it – inspired me to define what this is. What fundamentally guides what I create with Innermost Garden?

Defining Success

I’ve always considered myself to be a little radical, to live a little outside the box, to be a little bit more critically minded than average. Maybe this was just a story I told myself. Or maybe it was permission to be intentional about how I lived, even if it was a tad outside the norm.

Either way, I aim to create something I heartfelt believe in with Innermost Garden – not something that “should” exist, not videos that earn lots of likes, not headlines that spur clicks, not followers ultimately disinterested in going deeper, not photo spreads that inspire envy.

I want to help you live life more fully and shed what you no longer need.

Cheesy, it’s true. I deem Innermost Garden a success if it inspires one person to live today a little more aware, a little healthier, a little more aligned and in balance.

That’s it. Well…and, true to my radical story making, I wouldn’t mind offering an alternative to the capitalist mega-project that is the health and wellness industry.

Resisting Resistance

When I considered what I would create to share into the world, I wondered: What does resistance look like within the wellness, health, yoga, and mental health space?

I listed all the things about these spaces that irked me, all the common beliefs I disagreed with and found harmful:

Health

• Improvements come from outside, from experts
• Solutions are done to you or on you and often involve medications or drugs
• Access is expensive without insurance
• Masks symptoms, discomfort and pain

Yoga

• Focuses on flexibility and attaining difficult postures
• Intends to create a skinny, toned body
• Concerned with aesthetics, beauty, and style
• Operates separately from real life

Wellness

• Based in consumption and receiving
• Expensive, reserved for those with ample money
• Unscientific and “woo woo”
• Performative, likable

Mental Health & Therapy

• Emotions are evidence of what’s wrong with you, not signals of what needs to change
• Views people as broken and ill, needing fixing and interventions
• Scientific, psychopharmacology as precise
• Coping strategies are ignorance, maladaptive or a lack of self control

Looking at my list, I defined my first value:

I will stay focused on the solution, not massage the problem.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m grateful to those who explore and articulate all that’s wrong with modern psychiatry, Big Pharma, Big Wellness, co-opted yoga and yogalebrities, Goop, commercialized self care, HMO healthcare, and flawed gurus of all kinds.

Throw in all the negative we know about the technology and social media in your life, and your imposed world can feel like quicksand – the more you try to move away, the deeper you find yourself in this mess of dis-ease.

But here, I’ll stay focused on the solution.

A Manifesto of Sorts

Rising from my above observations, here are the tenets that Innermost Garden lives by:

1. Improvements come from within you and are based on your own lived experiences
2. Discomfort is a source of information and an opportunity for growth
3. Emotions are signals meant to be felt and move through, not held onto, repressed, or ignored
4. Forget about making everything perfect — wear what you wear, join in spaces available to you, name your true feelings, look sleepy if you are, and focus on the practice — allow mistakes
5. Guidance can be accessible, affordable, and available when you are, but you have to put in the work
6. All body types, ages, and abilities can benefit and participate to their own degree; if you need a modification, take it or ask for one
7. Clothes, venues, gadgets, and other things to buy are unrelated to results
8. Yoga (union) goes beyond any physical practice and extends off the mat into everyday life
9. Spirituality is a basic human need, not “woo woo”
10. Conservatives and progressives, skeptics and the deeply religious are all welcome here – make each practice your own, aligned with your beliefs
11. Solutions are done by you, each day, and don’t rely on drugs or medication (though I understand that consuming remedies can be helpful and fully accept your judgment in trusting what’s right for you at this time; no shade)
12. I incorporate alternative health modalities that are informed by time-tested, traditional wisdom and science-backed — though ultimately your own experience informs what is valuable to you
13. You are whole and complete within yourself and capable of improving and growing
14. Your responses are reasonable given your lived experiences, and you’re able to reprogram them to better align with your present situation
15. Bring a lightness and ease to all you create, don’t take life too seriously

I intend each space, class, hypnotherapy session, story, sadhana practice, and meditation I create to embody these principles.

A Note About Free

My intent is to offer meditations, insights, and sadhana practices free of charge. To do this, I’m grateful for the photographers, musicians, and videographers who make their work free so I can incorporate it into my work and pass it on.

I don’t feel better than those who charge or earn ad revenue for their work; I view my ability to gift these resources as a privilege to serve.

I consider the free resources on Innermost Garden my seva, giving time and energy to help others without expecting anything in return. I aim to uplift and serve the collective because what goes around comes around.

If you find something helpful, please support my work by sharing it with others. Pass it on (Spotify, Facebook, Instagram). And if you’re able or are called to support my work, consider gifting hypnotherapy to yourself or a loved one.

A Note About Paid

You’ll notice that I charge for hypnotherapy sessions. That’s because it’s a deeply personal, one-on-one offering catered specifically to you and your situation. It’s a professional service that should earn a livelihood, and I always want to honor fellow hypnotherapists. If cost is a serious hardship for you, please get in touch with me.

Hypnotherapy is the core of what I lead because I’ve found it can make the biggest impact in the shortest amount of time. It also informs and supports the free resources I offer. Hypnotherapy is the creation of a dedicated, focused space where deeper work happens. It’s a stage, if you will, for transformation.

Performance Versus Experience

I can see how the allegory of theater could suggest a performance quality of what I create, but I’m not crafting an imaginary world. Instead, I create and hold a space for your internal, personal experience.

Instead of crafting a production or communicating a solution or an explanation, I’m fully present with you as you experience and integrate what arises. I hope that what I lead invites a shifting within, just like great theater.

Photo credits on Unsplash, in order: Campagnons, November Wong, Daniele Levis Pelusi, Nik, Daniel Ramos, Markus Spiske, Lina Trochez, and Sam Spencer. Thank you.

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